Guided by Dreams

Yet another dream where the spirit animals have a prominent appearance. First I will disclose the meanings of each. Then I will describe the dream. Finally I will relate it to my life.

With the help of Auntyflo.com’s Dream Dictionary:

The Meanings

Black Snake: caution, negative energy, must harness energies, unfavorable development, related to my power, emotional storm, let go, move on

Pet: holding something dear to me, caring for others in waking life

Wild Animal as a Pet: embrace and enjoy a happy life. Stop worrying. Stop holding back.

Daughter: Innocence, purity, pleasant events ahead

Rattlesnake: warnings and to take them more seriously

Hidden: [not found] unexpected- Rattlesnake was minding its own business and quiet (not rattling tail): Relax, let things go as they do

Provoked to Kill: Mind my own business, stay out of it, saves me from harm (the black snake)?

Gardener: Inner cultivation, in my case- the masculine side (protector, problem solver, knowledgeable about situation and fearless)

Speaking with the gardener: I will be respected more than expected, enter into environment where I am highly honored.

Toad: positive change, productivity, self-development, put into action and learn to exude beauty from within

Orange: communication, expand horizons, new interests, joy

The Dream

There was a black snake that at first was wild and then somehow became my pet. It was kept in a glass tank by my house’s side gate. On afternoon, I went back to that location with my youngest daughter and saw the tank lid was raised on one side: The black snake had escaped! She quickly found it and grabbed it. Yikes! She is much braver than I. I do not like touching snakes. We put it back in the tank; however, I hadn’t realized that a rattlesnake had curled up to rest in the tank. The black snake immediately bit the rattlesnake, but the rattlesnake with its fiercer bite returned the attack and killed the black snake.

I went back inside the house until I saw the gardener mowing the backyard. I went out to yell a warning to him about the rattlesnake (the mower was loud) and that I didn’t know where it had gone. He turned the mower off and started showing me a trick to lure the snake out from its hiding place. It was a contraption of a stick with a fishing lure that would bounce around. As he explained how it worked, I watched a small bright orange toad hop along the ground. Then the gardener returned to the side walkway to seek out the hiding place of the rattlesnake, but with no luck.

The Interpretation

There are parts of my life that I hold dear even though they are negative and create undue worry. It has been difficult to let go and move on from these negative traits because it is scary. However, I must relax and let God take the lead. I must return to the flow as well as practice wu wei (action through non-action) in some of these situations. In a way, I must stay out of God’s way as He directs my life. By doing so, it saves me from the negative outcomes or saves me from myself. I must allow Christ to protect and show me The Way. If I can do this, then I will be highly respected and honored. I must let His beauty and my inner beauty to overflow. My world will be filled with joy as my horizons expand and I develop new interests.

One or both?

Which is my authentic self?

The woman of the day? Calm, contemplative, reserved, tactful, who edits so as not to offend…

Or is it the goddess in the night? Restless, with a wild spirit, full of fanciful ideals, who’ll post an exposé of her moments of truth…

I find it so peculiar to hide in the bright light of day yet revel in the craziest notions, judgments, and actions when the shadows protect…

My appearance of normalcy.

A Chat with My Old Friends

What’s the harm in trusting that someone loves me? I mean really? Why can’t I do it? Is it the fear that his love will be ripped out from beneath me when I least expect it? Am I terrified that he will change his mind on a whim or when a pretty young thing waltzes by giving him “the look”? Does it have to do with my self-confidence? Or his worthiness of my trust? Is it that I really don’t trust myself or is it that I can’t trust someone else? Let’s ask our buddy Pascal: What are your thoughts?

“Well, if the romantic does not trust her partner and her partner loves her, then she sabotages possible bliss, but if he doesn’t love her, then she dodges a bullet. If the romantic does trust her partner and her partner doesn’t really love her, then she may experience momentary happiness but will soon discover the truth and sorrow will ensue. But, she will get over it. Yet, if she trusts and it turns out that he truly loves her, then their shared love will grow deeper and stronger. And that is not something I would ever want to miss!”

I getcha, it is best to put my money on love! Thanks. But won’t I be made to look silly or be the fool if I openly love him when I’m not sure about his love for me?

“Might I interject, my beloved Arete?” Why yes, Aristotle… It’s so good to hear from you again, gosh, what’s it been? About 2370 years? You haven’t aged a bit! “As I was saying, my beloved, you must put on your crown!” What do you mean? Do you mean think or reason more? “No, no, the crown of Pride: You are a virtuous woman. You could never be the fool when you demonstrate the virtue of self-respect. You must think highly of yourself, you are a queen and should be treated as such.” Oh, yeah. Yeah! I am! Thanks man. And hey, you think when I go to Greece you could give the lowdown on the best local spots for authentic cuisine?

Okay, so the consensus is that it would be better to trust and to uphold my self-respect as being worthy of love! Well, how do I know that he is worthy of my love? I mean, the Bible says not to “give your pearls to swine” so I don’t want to give my adoration to someone who doesn’t deserve it.

“You will know by his character. He will be trustworthy if he follows Me: Is he sincere, honest, reliable? Does he keep his promises? I would never forsake you, does he?” Lord, thank you for leading him.

But people change their minds. What if he changes his mind? “If it is true that he loves you, then heed my wisdom: Love is infinite, eternal. Why is it eternal? It was never born; thus it can never die. Why is it infinite? It has no desires for itself; thus it is present for all beings… let go of yourself and you will be perfectly fulfilled. Open yourself to love, then trust your natural responses; and everything will fall into place.” Woah, Lao Tzu, dude… You just took it to a whole new level.

“J’aime, donc je suis.” Yes! I totally agree. But Descartes, you realize that not everyone here speaks French. Here, let me translate: I love, therefore I am. Love is what makes us come alive: It is the essence of our existence! “Yes, yes, and you must have complete and utter faith in that love or else life is not worth living.” Soren, do we really need to get that dark? hahaha just kidding. You’re right. You know, if I can’t trust love- it’s process, it’s heart ache, it’s joy, then this claim “to love” is only in vain.

“Hope.” Did you say something Erik? “You must resolve this dispute between trust and mistrust so that you build hope. Do you believe that perhaps your mistrust and fear of abandonment may have to do with your early relationship with your mother?” “No, no, zit is her oral fixation. Zat is vhy she gets zo much gratification vfrom ze tasting and sucking.” Woah woah woah Freud, simmer down man that is some personal shit your telling everyone there. Jeese… Erik, I’m sorry. What were you saying?

“I was just getting to the fact that in order to love, you first must know yourself through a well developed identity, which can only be done in the context of our social relationships; therefore, you must get to know others in order to understand who you are. And so that you can know them enough to determine their level of trustworthiness.” I love you Erik. You always know how to bring it back around. hahaha.

“Have enough courage to trust love one more time and always one more time.” Ah, thanks Maya.

And thank you to all my old friends, for sharing your wisdom on this issue. Before we go, let me sum it up. So, here’s what I’ve got so far…

I’ve got to know- and exude that I know- my worth! I’ve got to just… Take a leap of faith and trust, maybe not in the person- that will come as love manifests in their character- but, I must trust in love because that is why we exist…. Amen.

Be Love.

To James T., tf, bff

My Love,

I have missed your voice and the way you bring out my smile.

Some say “Time is an illusion,” but I still feel that it had been a while.

You are on your journey and I’m on mine.

But when we meet in dreams and music, I know everything’s gonna be just fine.

At times our paths are dark and our egos take comfort in the night.

But our souls search for more, so don’t be afraid to face the light.

Take my love without cost nor a plan to repay.

Just be filled and overflowing, then practice giving love away.

Thank you for being You because you bring out the best in me.

Forever yours,

Carole K., tf, bff

Entertainment for Hours

Brought to you by the letter P: Pandora, pen, p.. … potato fries!

Tomorrow is “Manifestation Day” so at 4:44 am and 4:44 pm, on 4/4/in the 4th numerological year and my Personal Year #4… I intend to Manifest some shit into my life! hahahha.

I apologized to my son last night, “I’m sorry.” He sounded confused when he asked, “Why?”

“Because I’m not telekinetic. But I’ll keep working on it!” He burst out with a whole hearted laugh, but he knew I was also slightly kidding, as I have already taught him to expand his qi ball and evaporate clouds. “I just need to figure out how to compose clouds now,” I declared one glorious afternoon as I attempted to trick the molecules into feeling cold so they would huddle together in their misty form.

Living in the 6D and practicing beyond surely is entertainment for hours. One might say that I don’t need anybody because I’m never alone- We’re all connected. Just go within and hop on the One Spirit Express for one hellava ride! But don’t be fooled: I need you.

When I travel, I go to my favorite spot… at the top of the mountain, breathing in the sunlight and the horizon. Then I get to work planning and navigating my internal google for past videos of laying bricks with proper slope for drainage, building the retaining walls, landscaping for water efficiency and natural pest repellants… Phew. Exhausting work. I wipe my brow and take a moment to jive… jam… just dance in the joy that is mine!

Then when the notion comes upon me to seek a conversation in the time and place beyond, I talk. I listen. But not with normal senses- For the fingertips can hear, pulsing to the rhythm as the “world keeps going around.” My mass suddenly drops to allow a new perspective: I feel as though I am a tree and a gust of wind rushed through my upper branches. I taste memories… usually of upstate New York: I’ve never contacted my cousin after having a “taste deja vu” but I should… Maybe it’s her higher self contacting mine- and it’s not just in my own body. And sometimes the sensations are not even mine. But I’ve learned to protect myself from that… except… I let you in.

I talk to myself from a distance, as if my conscience is on “the bench” rapping the gavel to sentence my ego for all her injustices on this poor soul! Then we all go out for a beer. My Higher Power communes without spoken words. Our spirits meet in the wind. We laugh. We cry. He leads me.

Hey, so I read the other day that the research says there’s more pleasure in being touched than in touching… myself. Did I mention that I long for your touch? I performed a twofold experiment: Feeling and being felt… Admit it! We’ve all done it! Right?

Anyhoo… I feel the sensation once on my skin… Then I experience from the perspectives of my fingertips.

Only a slight separation between feel and felt. No pleasure gap. Except when it’s real… Then kundalini rushes up to greet you. My mouth is dry just thinking about it.

Oh… and one last thing: I have decided that I am for sure, without a doubt, a googolplex-onaire’s daughter… Isn’t that the suffix used for the wealthy? So suck it, Larry! [Mic drop].

[Runs back to get the microphone…] “You too, Sergey.”

Alone in this

I just wish that I could talk to you. Especially during this time when I am flailing… grasping for thoughts that drift away too quickly. Your energy is my gravity so maybe if you were near, you’d ground these thoughts so that I could conclude… focus… ascertain this idea… so I look a little less crazy… a little less basic. Because there’s something there… I just know it! Except… you’re not here… so it all flutters away.

To my dearest girls,

Find your tribe! Don’t settle for those who exclude or make you feel unwanted. Dance to the beat of your own heart’s rhythm. If they look at you in a weird way because your moves weren’t choreographed, then look them straight in the eyes and keep dancing. You are a leader with a brilliant imagination and an expansive love for others. Only follow as a way to lead until you reconnect with the one who makes your soul leap: Then follow him, for I will have prayed that he will follow God. Make many friends in diverse places, but know that they will never fill that void within your heart. Instead, practice your breath.. Breathe Love into the void… Exhale the Love through your arms. Remember that “Greater is He who is in you than he who is in the world.” Go ahead and manifest your dreams, you have been given the power: Accept it. And finally… Never forget that my love is with you always!!!

Love,

Mom

Be & Go

Be. Thoughtful: Notice how someone else is feeling during this time.

Go. Lend a hand to those you care about as well as those in need.

Be. Okay: Solitude can be a blessing, especially when “solitude” means the family unit.

Go. Within in quietude so that you can listen to God.

Be. Appreciated: Accept that you are a beautiful creature with unique gifts.

Go. Bask in your blessings and the glory of God’s Love.